It’s 2 am and I’m still wide awake watching a live dota2 championship. Yes, I’m a dota2 freak and have liked watching the professional scene ever since. Thinking about it, it’s actually pretty crazy how much fame, and especially prize money, these pro players get out of playing a stupid computer game. Well that’s what an “educated” (yes I am double quoting with my eyes rolled) or an elderly person would say. Computer games are just games. It’s a waste of time and it makes you dumb. Yes mom. But if it makes you rich, then why not have a go at it. Making a living and doing something that you actually like, why the hell not. Getting signed by a team with standard salary will let you live each month. Winning a minor competition will add thousands of dollars in the bank account, maybe get yourself some nice clothes and good food. A major tournament? You’ll end up having an apartment and six digits in the bank account. Hell you might not even have to work for the next 2 years. Hmmm. I’ve always wondered what it’d be like, doing something that is actually worth living for.

Yes, I’m almost 26 years old, and I’m mentally at the crossroads of what I should be doing in my life. I’ve worked as an engineer for over 2 years now. It sucks major ass. My parents don’t like it when I openly say that. LOL. “That’s what a career is honey. Just keep working hard, it’ll eventually pay off.” My mom’s probably right, but the problem is I’m starting not to enjoy it. Maybe it’s because the company I work for, the work I do, or maybe just the idea of ‘working’ bothers me, waking up everyday at 5 am, coming home by nightfall with a tired mind; I don’t even know. So much shit goes on in my office, it feels like I’m dedicating my life, which is 8-10 hours a day, and the occasional phone calls and texts every night or in the weekends, for someone else’s future. What do I get it out of it? I don’t know. Most of the time it’s just a short ‘thank you’.

I’ve always envied people who spend their lives traveling around the world and living carefree. How do they do that, man. Save enough money, quit their jobs, set up a blog for passive income, buy a plane ticket to some random country, and keep going to the next place where they feel like going. The idea sounds easy and amazing on paper, but the gut to make the move is pretty crazy if you think about it. How can you just let go of the educational degree that you worked extremely hard for for several years, that eventually allowed you to get a job with a stable income, and of course the possibility of a promising career ahead of you for some adventure to find ‘who you truly are’ (as they say). “I want to travel at least to 3 continents and 30 countries by I’m 30.” That’s some dream. More like a vacation.

I’ve read a lot of traveling blogs and have become heavily influenced by it. It’s always fascinating to read amazing things that people find in another country. What the curry tastes like in India, how polite the people are in Japan, how crazy the nightlife is in Thailand, the beauty of the Philippines’ waters, the wild drunk parties filled with hot girls in Ibiza, and so much more. These are all on YouTube or from some movie btw. But experiencing it yourself must be another story.

I’ve always dreamt of going around the world just like these travelers. Yes I know that being a professional and working hard enough might get you a job somewhere else. Only if you’re looking for one, and only if the employers are interested in your shit-ass resume. It sounds pretty harsh, but I think I’m pretty accurate on that. There’s no certainty at all. I’ve had a couple of colleagues quitting the job for another company in another country. As to why they quit I can tell that it has something to do with comfort and what they got in return for what they had offered. They ended living somewhere else, writing a new, different and exciting chapter in their life.

My parents have always urged me to continue my study. My sister too. She’s somewhere in New York right now enjoying the American life. It’s not like she’s on a holiday, but it sounds like a good deal. By 2 years she’ll have another title to her name, and will have a story to tell about how she spent 2 years of her life in New York. I want that too. Even if I have to crack my head open thinking about physics and shit, if it takes me somewhere else, I’m in.

It sounds like a solid plan. Leave and never come back. But who knows if I’ll actually do it. Maybe it’s more like ‘leave for a while and come back to the same hell hole’. Or never leave at all. Well that’s what plan B’s and C’s are for. Hahaha.